Ya know I think I would have had a waaaaay different mission if that was the reason I started my mission. I can gladly say that's not at all the reason I went on a mission hahaha. Nah I wouldn't have done nearly as much if that was the only reason I was here. I think that's kinda the difference about the trials of different people's missions. I think no matter what kind of missionary you are, missions are still waay hard. The thing is they're just hard for totally different reasons. Someone who might've chose to serve a mission because all they wanted was to find someone to marry, isn't going to feel the same kinda pressure in finding people to teach and in being obedient and diligent and all that, as someone who chose to serve a mission because they love god. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to belittle anyone who started their mission without a solid reason to serve. I just think that the trials of why missions are hard are totally different depending on your reason for being on the mission. If all you're doing is trying to go through the motions of serving, the only reason a mission would be hard is just because it's long and you can't do all the things you did before. But if you're serving, and you truly do want to serve god and bring others unto Christ it's hard because you become invested of the lives of sooooo many people. You pray for the lives of so many people. You spend hours and days and weeks and months trying to do everything you possibly can to help people just feel a little bit of what's in your heart and then appointments fall through, commitments are not met, and those people, that you spent so much time with, that you invested so much in, just go away.
Yesterday I was talking with an elder and he said that he had a really incredible lesson and that him and his companion (who is still in training by the way) were trying to help someone understand the importance of the things that they were trying to express to him. The trainee asked the guy if he had ever tried Chicken Joy (which is just really good fried chicken) and the guy said ya. The trainee then told the guy to express to them what eating chicken joy was like as if they had never tasted it before. And ya the guy struggled and admitted that he couldn't do it. And then the trainee related that to them trying to share the gospel to him. As missionaries we could go on and on and on and on about the gospel. We could show videos, we could read scriptures, we could bare testimony, and invite others to follow these things to the end of time. But until people try it themselves, until people try to read on their own or pray or go to church, they will never fully grasp for themselves why these things are so important. I wish that I could give some great sermon that would inspire people's lives and that they could see and feel why these things are so great and be converted unto Christ and have faith that would never waver. But ya that's not god's plan. God's plan requires us to act. And more specifically it requires us to act on our own. When we choose to do or follow these things, it has to be a choice we make for ourselves.
I won't go a whole lot into why I specifically went on a mission now. But I will say that it was 100% my choice to be here. Before I made the decision to come I told myself I wouldn't go because of others. I wouldn't go because "it was the thing I was supposed to do" or because "I wouldn't be able to get married in the temple" or whatever. I had a testimony and a knowledge that these things were true and that more specifically that this was something I personally wanted and needed to do. I've seen a lot of change of hearts on the mission. I know that whatever reason got us on the mission, isn't the thing that keeps us going through the mission (we need way more reasons to stay), but I know that I'm happy here. I'm giving it my all. And despite how hard everything may be, I'll never have any kind of experience like this again that brings so much joy into my life and that inspires me to care so much about people that just a couple months ago that I didn't even know existed.
Word of the week: Paningkamot = to try (effort)
Love ya!
Elder Shirley
Word of the week: Paningkamot = to try (effort)
Love ya!
Elder Shirley
